be still

she sits with her brows furrowed, quietly willing the thoughts doing laps around her head to stay still

she is tired of her mind and her mind... tired of her inaction, you can see it on the lines of her face, you can see it on her feigned smile, you can see it in her hair, her skin the forced laugh she lets out in the company of others

she is perplexed, confused and shes looking for that spark, that passion, the drive the feeling of wanting something so bad... so bad and going out and striving for it

what happened? and where did they all go? will it come back? oh please come back.

to be able to do something for herself... she guesses she could, if she plucked up the courage to let go, let it all go and not feel like shes letting anyone down

let go of all things negative in her life, negative thoughts, negative people .. to create a life that she can confidently brand with her name.

she thinks its time, time to live for herself, time to love and care for herself

because amidst all the enlightenments and disenchantment, she has lost faith in people ... and perhaps even in herself and the things she can do...

...and so she sits, brows furrowed, willing the thoughts doing laps around her head to stay still.

here is to 2006!

 


for those who were beginning to wonder where i had dissappeared to.. IM BACK!!! with abit more oomfF! (i hope)

so christmas has passed and new years seems like ages ago but happy new year and merry christmas nonetheless.

ive been a combination of busy and lazy of late, whilst not blogging and barely being online, ive sorta managed to achieve the summer i had always wanted ... and ive even managed cleaned my room in the in-between moments, ive modified my curtains, been shopping, been swimming heaps ... to the beach, ive even started some working out... ive lazed about and basically ive been having a gaye old time trying to forget the unhappiness of last year.

christmas eve was spent at danny's place with the crowd and then at stanwell tops, new years eve this year was at lee's place, it was good because we didnt miss 2UE's countdown and we had lotsa beautiful fireworks going on all around us.. at mid-night we all gay-ly hugged everyone because afterall.. 'love one another' was sydney's theme this year.

although last year wasn't exactly a bad year ... it just seemed rather slow
in a way i accomplished some things, but in another sense i feel like it wasnt enough given all the time i had... it was like i was on idle mode all through 2005

this year im hoping things will change, i will discover the great things that i am meant for .. whatever they might be...

so i will look on to 2006 with hope and may it bring hope and happiness to all

CHEERS